This post was inspired by a quote from Edgar Cayce Story of The Soul by W.H. Church: ” Meanwhile, what of that call from the lord unto Abraham? For the lord had sent him a very clear message: “Depart from your country, and from your kindred, and from your  father’s house; and come unto a land that I will show you. But did the call actually originate within Abraham’s heart, as a result of his strong spiritual yearning? Or did that yearning serve merely to create a condition of psychic receptivity, and did the call itself come from without? The latter, according to our psychic source.”

Why I wanted to Leave My Hometown

Leaving your hometown can feel exciting, lonely, empowering, and overwhelming all at once. If you’re thinking about how to leave your hometown and start over in a new city, this is what I learned from doing it intentionally — the good, the hard, and the unexpected realities no one talks about.Making the decision to leave your hometown is rarely just about geography — it’s about identity, growth, and becoming who you’re meant to be.

When I was reading this book and came across this line, so many thoughts ran through my mind. The first being the obvious that we all need to leave where we came from in order to get where we need to be in life. And it needs to be an intentional decision from you, not something you were forced to do. Sometimes we can’t receive the messages that will change or aid our lives because of the environment we are in. This post will be about my personal experiences in leaving my hometown intentionally and everything that happened along the way. All the good, bad, and ugly. According to U.S. Census migration data, millions of Americans relocate each year in search of opportunity, independence, or a fresh start. So you are not the only one having this urge to leave.

The Emotional Reality of Moving Away

The first time that I got a taste of life outside of my hometown was a little bit after I graduated high school, and we started going to the club in Washington, D.C. I’m from a small town roughly  45-50 minutes away from the nation’s capital, and honestly, that was where all the fun was. My club experience was typical for my age, so there wasn’t anything special about that specific experience. It was the fact that I was introduced to a completely different world from the one in which I grew up. That was the first time I understood why people feel the pull to leave their hometown in search of something bigger.

I started to realize that there is so much more to discover in the world and so many people to meet. Once I was situated and set up to start my community college classes, I started to venture out looking for jobs outside of where I lived. My first 3 jobs were in my hometown, and then I realized that I would get paid more if I traveled outside of my comfort zone. I made it as far as Washington, D.C. before I landed back in Chantilly, Virginia, for a job opportunity that I could not turn down. That job was the best job I had landed, so I stuck with it for about a year, and then I made the decision that it was time to move out. I was ready to be independent, I wanted my own identity, my own life, and my own privacy. I was 24 years old when I purchased my first home in Baltimore City. I had fallen in love with D.C., but unfortunately, I could not get into their first-time home buyers program because of the priority for D.C. Residents. Which was completely understood. So I ventured out to Maryland to one of the toughest cities in America, lol. 

Before You Leave, Ask Yourself This

If you are deciding to leave your hometown, make sure you aren’t running from anything. When I finally closed and had my own home that I worked hard for, I was ecstatic. I could not believe that I really did it. I purchased a car a little after I closed, and let me tell you, the bubble that I was in had burst because the shadow work I was avoiding came roaring up its ugly head, along with those demons that I thought I got rid of. It started to become lonely when I wasn’t distracting myself. COVID hit, and it got a little worse. But in between all the ups and down I met some amazing people who helped me along the way. I was not familiar with the history of the house that I had purchased, but I had a neighbor who left a sticky note offering to be an affordable handyman in case I needed help. I was hesitant at first, but then he turned out to be a blessing in disguise. I was introduced to my other immediate neighbors, and when I did my evening reflection, I realized that I was supposed to be there, and the souls that I met were there to help and even look after me. I went on to sell that house and continued to make lifelong friends at my job, in my new city, basically everywhere I went. After some annual reflections, I realized that everywhere I ended up, I always met people who helped me along the way. People that I still try to stay in contact with because the relationship was that meaningful. I never had anything to worry about when I left my hometown, and people were waiting for me when I arrived back home. Moving away from home won’t fix unresolved patterns — it only changes the backdrop.

What Happens After You Move

If you are deciding to leave where you are from, my suggestion would be to make sure you aren’t running from anything. No matter how far you go or where you end up, what you were running from will always be right behind you or pulling you back with the strongest cord made of guilt. When you decide to leave, make sure you do so on good terms and with good intentions. You should have some confidence and somewhat high self-esteem because you will be an easy target. Major life changes like moving away from home will test your confidence in ways you can’t predict, which is why rebuilding self-belief before a transition is so important. Just like you can tell when someone new is moving around your hometown, you will stick out like a sore thumb in someone else’s. 

Make sure you are going exactly where you dreamed of. Do not settle for a different location; you don’t want to get in the habit of settling for anything less than what you want or deserve. Have healthy plans in place that will help you cope when times get lonely. I was in a 4-bedroom, 3-level townhome, and the loneliness started to become a lot, so I ended up getting a dog. Only get what you can handle in all aspects. I really should have gotten a one-bedroom condo or just rented for a while; the townhome was too much to upkeep, and I was overwhelmed by myself. That in itself made it easier to sell. 

How To Start Over The Right Way

Take the time to applaud yourself for what you just achieved. I would recommend putting a mood board together of what you are striving to curate in your new home. When I first moved, I relied heavily on visualizing the life I wanted in my new city. That practice helped me stay aligned even when loneliness hit. Starting over in a new city requires more mental preparation than people realize.

Also, make sure you have a master list of everything you want to have so you can stay organized with your purchases. Be creative in decorating your home, which is your safe place, and you want to make it as comfortable and cozy as possible. 

Protect your space from unnecessary energies. Don’t allow everyone into your home; sometimes, the people we think we can trust can have bad energy or vibrations during the best moments of your life. Not everyone deserves a seat at your table; be selective in who you allow to share your space. Be grateful for what you have now and the journey it took to get there. Life is all about experiencing, and sometimes we need the memory of the journey to really appreciate what we have. Lastly, stay consistent with maintaining what you just accomplished, oftentimes we pray for the “thing” but don’t pray to ensure we know how to keep it. 

What to Do If You Have To Move Back Home

Just in case you do lose your home, or you have to move back where you started, don’t beat yourself up for starting over. Many people who leave their hometown eventually return at some point — and that doesn’t erase the courage it took to try. Oftentimes, life will force us to start over because we were headed down the wrong path. God and our spiritual team will intervene to get us off that path because that is not where our life was supposed to be. It may feel like you are losing everything, but that may be necessary to make space for what you really deserve. Also, if you were running from something, it would have to catch up to you so you can deal with it and finally put it to rest. It’s better to live life without guilt or “what if’s” and to do that, you have to confront what you have been avoiding. Remember who you are when times get tough. If you were capable of accomplishing your goals before “the fall,” nothing is stopping you from doing it again. You are still you without the materialistic things we collect from life. 

Frequently Asked Questions

Is it a good idea to leave your hometown?

Leaving your hometown can be a powerful decision if it is intentional. If you are moving toward growth, independence, or opportunity, it can change your life. If you are running from unresolved issues, those same problems will follow you wherever you go. The key is clarity before action.

How do I start over in a new city alone?

Starting over in a new city requires preparation and emotional maturity. Secure a stable income first, build a small support system, and keep your expectations realistic. Loneliness is normal in the beginning, but consistency and patience will help you create community over time.

What should I consider before moving away from home?

Before leaving your hometown, ask yourself:

• Am I running from something?
• Do I have a financial plan?
• Am I emotionally prepared for isolation?
• Do I have a clear reason for moving?

Moving intentionally is very different from moving impulsively.

What if I have to move back home?

Moving back home is not a failure. Sometimes life redirects you for growth or protection. If you were capable of building once, you are capable of building again. Starting over is part of the process for many successful people.